Ever felt disappointed by Hollywood casting agents' inability to put together cinematic dynasties that feel real? Welcome to Hollywood Genealogy: we don't just tell you who looks "separated at birth", we sell you the whole family history.

All you need is a studio, a crew, and the money. You can thank us on Oscar night.

queenbeehoney:

Please oh please oh please


It’s probably best we don’t get into this one.

queenbeehoney:

Please oh please oh please

It’s probably best we don’t get into this one.

Rod Lawrence (Don Cheadle) has never seen eye-to-eye with his brother Teddy (Edi Gathegi), ever since his parents announced - after Rod’s 15 blissful years of only-child status - that Santa Claus was bringing him a surprise baby brother. So when their father asks Rod and Teddy to look after the family party-planning business while he takes sick leave, the two brothers realise their 15-year age gap means they have very different ideas about how best to throw the biggest party in town: the Mayor’s birthday. Will Rod’s white-tie cocktail party or Teddy’s street dance spectacular win out?

Rod Lawrence (Don Cheadle) has never seen eye-to-eye with his brother Teddy (Edi Gathegi), ever since his parents announced - after Rod’s 15 blissful years of only-child status - that Santa Claus was bringing him a surprise baby brother. So when their father asks Rod and Teddy to look after the family party-planning business while he takes sick leave, the two brothers realise their 15-year age gap means they have very different ideas about how best to throw the biggest party in town: the Mayor’s birthday. Will Rod’s white-tie cocktail party or Teddy’s street dance spectacular win out?

Christian Kane and the late David Foster Wallace star in "Parker Gaddy." In and out of correctional facilities since the age of 9, orphan Kip Nolan (Kane) was recruited by the CIA and raised to be the perfect assassin: cold, emotionless and utterly without mercy or free will. Inside however, Kip dreams of abandoning this life to write. By night, using his government-trained skills of disguise and deception, Kip dons a pair of glasses and (using archived footage of old David Foster Wallace interviews) becomes Parker Gaddy, troubled intellectual, brilliant lecturer, and writer of the instant cult classic, No One Can Stop the Maze Thieves.

This has “Sundance Film Festival favourite” written all over it.

Joseph Gordon Levitt and Cloud Campos star as brothers Micky and John Silverwood in this thrilling paean to the power of dance. Deaf from the age of 10, when a backyard accident burst his eardrums, Micky Silverwood has always been a disappointment to his father, who had dreams of both his boys becoming concert violinists. The only person who believes in Micky is his older brother, John - and when John sees Mickey responding to the rhythm of a passing locomotive, he decides that they will become the best street-dance duo Michigan has ever seen. Will it be enough to win back their father’s love of his youngest son?

Joseph Gordon Levitt and Cloud Campos star as brothers Micky and John Silverwood in this thrilling paean to the power of dance. Deaf from the age of 10, when a backyard accident burst his eardrums, Micky Silverwood has always been a disappointment to his father, who had dreams of both his boys becoming concert violinists. The only person who believes in Micky is his older brother, John - and when John sees Mickey responding to the rhythm of a passing locomotive, he decides that they will become the best street-dance duo Michigan has ever seen. Will it be enough to win back their father’s love of his youngest son?

Sherilyn Brandis (Mary Louise Parker) has been dedicating her days to her small but successful interior design business when she gets the most important call of her life: the President Of The United States wants to remodel the Oval Office. It’s the job that could set her up for good - but when her father insists that her tearaway younger sister Meg (Anna Silk) join the business to clean up her act, Sherilyn’s perfect world starts to crumble. Can they patch things up as they paste up wallpaper?

Sherilyn Brandis (Mary Louise Parker) has been dedicating her days to her small but successful interior design business when she gets the most important call of her life: the President Of The United States wants to remodel the Oval Office. It’s the job that could set her up for good - but when her father insists that her tearaway younger sister Meg (Anna Silk) join the business to clean up her act, Sherilyn’s perfect world starts to crumble. Can they patch things up as they paste up wallpaper?

District attorney Carol Abrams (Helen Hunt) has spent her life pining secretly for the daughter she was forced to give up for adoption 30 years ago. So when she experiences a connection with Annie Jacobson (Leelee Sobieski), a troubled young woman who passes through her courtroom, Abrams is convinced she has found her daughter. Will she risk everything and throw her professional ethics into dispute in order to find out the truth?

District attorney Carol Abrams (Helen Hunt) has spent her life pining secretly for the daughter she was forced to give up for adoption 30 years ago. So when she experiences a connection with Annie Jacobson (Leelee Sobieski), a troubled young woman who passes through her courtroom, Abrams is convinced she has found her daughter. Will she risk everything and throw her professional ethics into dispute in order to find out the truth?

Good cop. Bad cop.  Criminal.
The Maltzhan brothers, the last sons of a New York City Police dynasty, have hardly been what anybody would call close, least of all these days - Michael (Gary Sinise) is a good cop on the fast track to the top, hot-head Ray (Michael Keaton) is a vice detective struggling to keep his nose clean, and Jimmy (Liev Schreiber)… well, the less said about Jimmy the better.  But when a death in the family reveals a secret that shakes the family dynamic to the very core, the brothers find that they have no choice but to face the past head on…

Good cop. Bad cop. Criminal.

The Maltzhan brothers, the last sons of a New York City Police dynasty, have hardly been what anybody would call close, least of all these days - Michael (Gary Sinise) is a good cop on the fast track to the top, hot-head Ray (Michael Keaton) is a vice detective struggling to keep his nose clean, and Jimmy (Liev Schreiber)… well, the less said about Jimmy the better.  But when a death in the family reveals a secret that shakes the family dynamic to the very core, the brothers find that they have no choice but to face the past head on

When a family hiking trip goes horribly wrong, siblings Tony and Jenna Owens must fend for themselves in the bleak Alaskan wilderness. Jimmi Simpson and Scarlett Johansson star in this gripping thriller that pits two lost city slickers against the most terrifying killer of all: nature.

When a family hiking trip goes horribly wrong, siblings Tony and Jenna Owens must fend for themselves in the bleak Alaskan wilderness. Jimmi Simpson and Scarlett Johansson star in this gripping thriller that pits two lost city slickers against the most terrifying killer of all: nature.

Alan Tudyk and Arthur Darvill star as brothers Reggie and Robbie West in West’s End, a hilarious caper set in Dickensian London. When the famous West brothers, twin theatre superstars, tire of their fast-paced lives, they fake their own deaths in a carriage crash and pose as West End panhandlers. But will they be able to keep up the charade once their former agent starts to put the moves on Reggie’s mourning wife?

Alan Tudyk and Arthur Darvill star as brothers Reggie and Robbie West in West’s End, a hilarious caper set in Dickensian London. When the famous West brothers, twin theatre superstars, tire of their fast-paced lives, they fake their own deaths in a carriage crash and pose as West End panhandlers. But will they be able to keep up the charade once their former agent starts to put the moves on Reggie’s mourning wife?

Two estranged brothers (James Woods, Gregg Henry) are thrown back into  each other’s lives when a woman from the idyllic hometown they both thought they’d left behind reveals that one  of them may be a father…

Two estranged brothers (James Woods, Gregg Henry) are thrown back into each other’s lives when a woman from the idyllic hometown they both thought they’d left behind reveals that one of them may be a father…